For the past 5 years I have also been trying to meditate rather unsuccessfully though. Its my belief that meditation helps to channelise your energy, helps in concentration and removes negativity in thought. Also it takes you to a higher level -that of supreme bliss. So I will sit cross legged(Sukhasana) and concentrate on my breathing. My yoga teacher had told that this is the best form of meditation -that of concentration on the inhalation and exhalation. And so I begin…
By the count of ten my mind will begin its ‘exercise’. It will start with the menu of the day. I like to finish of my cooking early in the morning so that my day is free for the ministration of my son. So it will begin with thinking of a balanced and nutritious diet, something which is also edible and liked by all. Which will be followed by the unique methodology for the day of feeding my son. Its a daily battleground; with him refusing and me insisting. Then it will be the turn of my husband -whether he will be able to achieve his target of the day and the month, whether the external factors be favorable for him. And so on and so forth. Sometimes I even worry about my neighbour’s cold.
Once every now and then I will change tactics and try to concentrate on the spot between the eyebrows(bhrumadhya). But in my over enthusiasm to succeed, I will try so hard that I will land up with a headache.
Sometimes I will position myself in the prayer room thinking to concentrate on God’s image but my mind invariably will drift to stories of the Ramayana, Mahabharata or some other religious text.
Such has been my journey. But I haven’t lost heart or hope. Will keep trying till I succeed. After all if Mahatma Gandhi could dedicate his whole life for experiments with truth; an ordinary mortal like me can spend it experimenting with meditation. So….. strive on.