My parents recently celebrated their wedding anniversary and every time the do so, I am amazed. Two diverse personalities both look wise and nature wise have managed to stay together so long and whats more have raised three children and continue to guide and pamper them.
when I look back I don’t ever remember Papa ever getting any gifts for Amma. Just getting that occasional samosa, alu bonda while returning from plant was enough surprise to her and used to give her enough happiness. Rest fo the time she was happy to being a backbone to him, maintaining the family and being creative not only in the kitchen but also stitching, knitting, in the garden, teaching us etc. And thus helped him save money. I don’t remember her demanding anything. Whatever she demanded was for us. He in turn never demanded anything from her other than tasty food (and a variety of them :)).
So what kind of love was it, giftless, wordless. By wordless I mean never have I seen them expressing their love for each other. Once I had asked Mummy that she being beautiful; how she had agreed to marry him and she had replied that she had never noticed how he looked and when he had been asked that he being so knowledgeable had agreed to marry her , had replied that a home is not made up of looks or knowledge but of other qualities too which I will understand by and by. I won’t say that they never fought or never argued, they did but then they were always ready to forgive.
If I go a generation earlier my maternal grandparents were no better. I haven’t ever seen them talk but when they did they were in perfect tandem. I often wondered how. My grandma had said it was not always like that; but it became so because they took the time to understand each other and adapt themselves.
I won’t be a hypocrite and say that I don’t like getting flowers or gifts but when I see people do so and then see that later they break up, I often wonder that why did they bother to do so earlier.
Like my father said there are many other qualities for marriage than just looks or your accomplishments; patience, understanding, ability to forgive there is so much more.
Now why all these thoughts now? Saw a programme yesterday which was debating whether there should be a single day for celebrating love or love should be celebrated all year through. I won’t be judgmental but my take is that Love should be nurtured all year through but if there is a special day; whats wrong with it.
And with this post I complete 200 posts. Thank you people for being with me so far.