Of ‘kali kaal’

A is not my friend anymore’, my son said after his return from school. ‘Hmmm’, I said. It is common. He has a new best friend every day and sometimes twice in a day.

I have still ‘kept’ my friends from school, college, etc. But not colleagues. Why I often wonder. Maybe it is because it is superficial when you are working, you just befriend somebody. And then being of the ’emotional’ types, I prefer keeping everyone at arm’s length lest I am hurt by anyone.

But increasingly I have distanced myself even from the ones with whom I was close to. Why you may ask. Well people change. So I may not like someone’s partying/ smoking/ drinking, in short their style of living and they may not like my spiritual side.

‘Amma, you are not listening,’ screams my son. “yes tell me’, I say and refocus.

‘Amma’, I lost my red color pencil and teacher asked to use that only. At that time N quietly lend me his red pencil and…………. And so he is now my best friend’, he declared.

If only things were as simple with us adults.

Relationships, friendships change with time, doesn’t it?

When my grandmother first heard ofย  the word ‘divorce’ she screamed,’ what more will I see in this ‘kali kaal’, she screamed. Well I can vouch she saw ‘nothing’.

If she saw the morals of today, the corruption etc , she would have died before her death.

This is the month of Kartik also known as the Damodar month. A month in which we visit house,s singing praises of the Lord after which we offer a ghee lamp aarthi to Him. These visits are not impromptu but booked in advance. Very often we get royal welcome in simple circumstances and indifference in royal homes. ‘Kali kaal’, indeed. I am not questioning spiritual preferences but basic courtesies. But then maybe I am asking too much.


* kali kaal-the age of kali or conflict

18 thoughts on “Of ‘kali kaal’

  1. Bhagyashree,

    You are right. Relationship do undergo change with times. Childhood is the best time with friends but as we grow up so many other factors influence this. It is good to have cordial relations with all in office but difficult to be close to anyone. Thanks for information about this month.

    Take care

  2. “royal welcome in simple circumstances and indifference in royal homes” is at once humorous and sad.
    Your take on friendship is nice.I feel unless nurtured by contact or communication friendships wither away.
    Change in circumstances,location,new interests also erode friendships

  3. you are asking for toooo much mam,

    In the last 4-5 days I have seen something that i would have never dreamed of, A person a well known person write a post on my name, praising me of all the good things this and that , the same person after two days says entirely different things about me .. and then they say they are honest people ๐Ÿ™‚

    such are the people in the world…

    Friendship ot me means a lot, I am a person who will never let go ever, I respect it a lot, to me it holds a different meaning we may meet after 20 years but my love and care for you will be the same or at least that what i pray for from the almighty.

    yes they do change but so do we ๐Ÿ™‚

    Happy diwali to you and family , have a great day and enjoy the festivitesssssssssssssss

  4. Happy Deepawali to you and your family, Bhagya! God bless you! Be happy always!

    It was easy for me to make friends till my forties…I had many friends when I was in Hosur. Maybe all of us had same aged children and it was easy to discuss home and children. Now, only relatives. It is not easy to maintain ‘friendship’ with relatives but I do my best to keep contact with most of them. As you said the mood fluctuates and they express it without second thoughts!

    Even with the Hosur friends, while talking occasionally over phone, we seem to talk about old times, no new topic…preferences have changed…we don’t have day to day contact…even their children and our children don’t have much to discuss about! Funny.

    Life goes on…

  5. I didn’t know about Kaali kaal. but I have seen that as i have grown, it is hard to form new friendships.. may be the criteria to be friends become high and one becomes more choosy. and independent too…

  6. Divorce…
    You know, Reema..
    This kaal is not good.. the days of honesty, of being men of honour, of upkeeping one’s word are over.. people play with lives the way they play with dice..
    But then, thinking of it, did that not happen even with Draupadi too??
    It’s been there – the Kali kaal.. from ages and centuries and Ramayan and Manhabharata times.. it has been there.. what has changed?

    • There have been 4 yugas. Satyug, treta, Dwapar and kali yug. Kaliyug is the shortest and the most conflict ridden.

      We take whatever happened with SIta or Draupadi superficially but there is much to be learnt within

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