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To new beginnings

ID-100274982‘What?’, that was the expression of an acquaintance on knowing my age. People are indeed misled especially on seeing my about to be eight son. They assume me to be much younger.Well when I was young, I had planned that I would finish my studies by 23, work for two years and enjoy my singledom, get married by 25 and have kids by 27. But none of that happened. By 40 I had assumed that

  1. I would be successfully running my small-scale industry
  2. I would have a horde of people working for me
  3. My kids would be about to enter high school
  4. I would have controlled my anger
  5. I would have grey streaks in my hair
  6. I would take life as it is.
  7. my partner and myself would have an amicable relationship
  8. I would have a place of my own and so on

The first four never materialized. The fifth didn’t either. I don’t have any silver streaks, you just have to count the hair on my head 😀 The rest I did achieve. The sixth more so. And I achieved something more. I had assumed that turning forty would be frightening. I mean isn’t that OLD. But when I did turn 40 a few months back; nothing happened. I didn’t suddenly turn into a hunchback,  nor did I lost my teeth, nor did I suddenly develop wrinkles. Life was as it was. Yes, I am calmer, have a more balanced approach, not easily carried away by flattery and am able to see through the flamboyance of people. You may think that why am I saying all this when my birthday is over long back. Yes, birthday is over but isn’t it the end of this year and a beginning of a new one? Life will go on in 2015 too. There will be births and deaths. Some milestones will be achieved. There will be accidents, there will be terrorists. You may lose some friends but you will regain some too. Some will manage to become thin, some will pile on some. Life will go on……… Ideally it would be better if we could take each day as a  new beginning. Try to make a relationship better, exercise more, rest some more, read a little, share some more, hold your anger; laugh some more. And most important spend some time to smell the roses. Here is to Happy beginnings……………….. ID-100294184   Image courtesy;www. freedigitalphotos.net

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A Special Day!!

In this journey of life we meet many people. But only some who leave their mark in our mind.

Similarly in this virtual world of blogging too, I have met many wonderful people. A person whom I have become very fond of celebrates  his birthday today. Warm, caring, understanding, active, he is all these and much more.

Many people whom I know start feeling sorry for themselves when they grow old. Some become childishly demanding. But here is a person who uses his time efficiently, very self-reliant and very inspiring.

So folks bring your palms together to wish …………………Partha Sir of random thoughts and reflections a Very Happy Birthday!! Hope you have a wonderful day and a year ahead and please continue writing more and more.

Go ahead people wish him!! 😀

Some time ago….

1963

He was sad. And lonely. Yes his mother was staying with him but yet….

He knew he was a fool, a jerk but still…

He never knew how to behave in situations….

He ought to have said bye but why did he act so sullen, so withdrawn. She must be so upset. Ohh, he was such a fool!!

Hadn’t she adjusted so well in these alien circumstances. Yes from a sheltered life she had come to this township and had not she made it their home, Made friends within a short span of 9 months. Set up home, looked after his needs. And cooked well too even though she had never done so before their marriage.

Yes in someways she was childish too. Like every holiday she had to be taken for a movie, otherwise she would just ignore him as if he was non-existent. He smiled at those memories.

And wasn’t she a fast learner. She had demanded that he buy her an USHA sewing machine and in no time she had learn to stitch. He smiled proudly.

And then he become morose. So understanding and yet his behavior sometime made him ashamed of himself. Like the way he got angry when something was not done according to his liking or now when she went to her parent’s place for her first delivery as was the custom. Oh why, had not he smiled at least while she was leaving, why get angry?

How to tell her how he missed her, how to make her happy? How how?

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My father never knew how to react to situations. Like when his wife, my mother was going for her first delivery, he was sad and yet he did not know how to tell her that and instead got angry.

He has always been like that but he also been dependable, loving, understanding and broad minded. And when amma handled home, he handled work and shared some responsibilities of the kids like teaching them, feeding them. My fondest memories of him are the times when he covered up my notebooks in the beginning of every school year and of him polishing my PT shoes and that is apart form him answering my numerous questions and taking me on a ride on his green scooter.

And today is his 75th Birthday!! I wish him a Very Happy Joyous birthday. Though I had meant to do a lot for my parents but could never do anything, I just hope that this post will rekindle the memories of the past and I think he will like ‘this’ gift.

Do you want to know what happened next,how he made amma happy.

My father had to tell his thoughts to my mother but there was a problem. My father did not know Kannada and amma did not know Malayalam ( Amma was born in Karnataka so she studied in Kannada medium, Papa in Kerala so Malayalam medium; konkani what we speak at home does not have any script. people write konkani in whatever script they can write. Like People born in Karnataka write konkani in kannada script, I write in Devanagari).

So papa learnt to write Kannada and started writing long letters to her. 😀

Ending this year with…..

I have not made resolutions since the time I got  my voting rights but there are some things which I take care of

  • Switch off the lights where and when they are not needed
  • Do not allow any water leakages
  • DO my morning routine of yoga and later a walk
  • I have stopped reading negative reports (read newspapers)
  • Trying to smile more often
  • Learning to be humble
  • Trying to be submissive (when needed)
  • Reduced my expectations.

In the hope that I will continue with these endeavours

Have a wonderful 2012.

Though there will be always

some good and some bad,

let us always see some good in

whatever bad we have

and in whatever good that happens

remember that it too shall pass.

Open up your hands, your heart, your intelligence

to accept whatever life gives you

-Brickbats and bouquets

with a smile.

Share the cheer

Spread the joy

Halve the pains

Aggregate the losses

Rouse the trodden

Embrace the fallen.

 

Try the silent

Hearten the crestfallen

Entertain the golden

 

Catch the brats

Have a toast

Entertain all

En masse and

Revivify all

SHARE THE CHEER

this festive season.

Happy Holidays

Don’t nag me, I say,
I will chatter for I have my thoughts
If I stop my thoughts you see,
they do their hip hop
And then they become like paneer burji
Soft and mushy mushy

And give me a headache.
So don’t stop me I say(s),
My potluck of feelings is mine;
Mine alone
Feelings that are tax-free
And I will share it

In my scribbles
Share it in temples
In streets
In conversations
In pictures
I will

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Now, now don’t get hyper that I finally lost it or don’t even think of getting a psychiatrist for me. Just my way of wishing a Happy Holidays. I am sorry I could not include all the blogs that I read but I could fit only these in this nonsense of mine 😀

On love and loving

My parents recently celebrated their wedding anniversary and every time the do so, I am amazed. Two diverse personalities both look wise and nature wise have managed to stay together so long and whats more have raised three children and continue to guide and pamper them.

when I look back I don’t ever remember Papa ever getting any gifts for Amma. Just getting that occasional samosa, alu bonda while returning from plant was enough surprise to her and used to give her enough happiness. Rest fo the time she was happy to being a backbone to him, maintaining the family and being creative not only in the kitchen but also stitching, knitting, in the garden, teaching us etc. And thus helped him save money. I don’t remember her demanding anything. Whatever she demanded was for us. He in turn never demanded anything from her other than tasty food (and a variety of them :)).

So what kind of love was it, giftless, wordless. By wordless I mean never have I seen them expressing their love for each other. Once I had asked Mummy that she being beautiful; how she had agreed to marry him and she had replied that she had never noticed how he looked and when he had been asked that he being so knowledgeable had agreed to marry her , had replied that a home is not made up of looks or knowledge but of other qualities too which I will understand by and by. I won’t say that they never fought or never argued, they did but then they were always ready to forgive.

If I go a generation earlier my maternal grandparents were no better. I haven’t ever seen them talk but when they did they were in perfect tandem. I often wondered how. My grandma had said it was not always like that; but it became so because they took the time to understand each other and adapt themselves.

I won’t be a hypocrite and say that I don’t like getting flowers or gifts but when I see people do so and then see that later they break up, I often wonder that why did they bother to do so earlier.

Like my father said there are many other qualities for marriage than just looks or your accomplishments; patience, understanding, ability to forgive there is so much more.

Now why all these thoughts now? Saw a programme yesterday which was debating whether there should be a single day for celebrating love or love should be celebrated all year through. I won’t be judgmental but my take is that Love should be nurtured all year through but if there is a special day; whats wrong with it.

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And with this post I complete 200 posts. Thank you people for being with me so far.